Extraversion: Outgoing or Reserved

When it comes to Extraversion you are:
SOMETIMES OUTGOING, SOMETIMES RESERVED

Words that describe you:
~Moderate ~Amiable
~Laid-back ~Temperate ~Relaxed ~Poised
~Civil ~Uncommitted ~Pleasant
A General Description of How You Interact with Others
Lucky you! You enjoy your own company as much as you enjoy the company of others. You are a great conversationalist and thrive in the wonderful kinds of connections you know how to have with your family and friends. You also equally enjoy your own company, whether sitting in a favorite chair with your book and soft music playing or meandering in the woods by yourself. You like coming home to your family or your roommate; but if no one is home, you find quiet, solitary time to be just as pleasurable. What a great combination to enjoy being outgoing and to be just as comfortable being reserved. Lucky you!! Because you are so amiable and relaxed, you are comfortable with almost any group of family or friends. Whether they are pumped up and lively or calm and subdued, you remain at ease. If someone needs to take over the conversation, you are comfortable taking the lead; you can also lay back and let someone else be in charge. If the conversation gets rowdy, your moderate demeanour will often draw it down to a more temperate level. If someone in the group loses their cool, you will most likely maintain your poise, and if they get nasty you know how to keep a civil tongue. You may find yourself out of balance on occasion. If you're alone too much, you may need to get in touch with someone. If you spend too much time with your family and friends, you may need to sneak off for a day by yourself, to putter and read and clear your head of the noise of too much conversation. When you're at your best, you live with a rhythm of time with others, time alone, time with others, time alone It's a satisfying, comfortable balance. Lucky you!

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
You may occasionally run into problems with other people. Since not everyone is as balanced as you are, close friends and family may get frustrated with you, or you with them. They may be more sociable and outgoing, and find you too laid-back and relaxed. They want conversations to be lively and passionate while you keep things amiable and civil. Or others may be more quiet and reserved than you, and when you're in one of your more animated moments they may wish you would back off. You may be ready to put more energy into a conversation than they are comfortable with. And your balance may be a problem. Other people may be consistently more sociable or more reserved than you, and find you to hard to read, some may even say you ride the fence. Others may find themselves envious of your ability to be outgoing at times, and at other times comfortably reserved. If you pay attention to pick up these cues you will be in a better position to know how you want to interact with such folks.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Most people will truly appreciate your flexibility in social situations. They will like you for your amiable warmth and your willingness to engage, and for your ability to sit back and let others take the lead or the spotlight. They will appreciate ways in which you temper what could become intemperate moments; by remaining poised and relaxed when others; temperatures are rising, you keep things civil and sane. You are as good at listening and following as you are at talking and leading, and people will often appreciate your ability to adapt to the situation. Because you are sometimes outgoing and sometimes reserved, you will make most people comfortable in your presence, and they will truly enjoy your company.

Conscientiousness: Focused or Flexible

In the attempt to continue to figure out who God has made me to be, this has helped me to kind of "peg" what I do and why I do it. It's not the WHOLE nutshell, but some;)

Your approach toward your obligations is:
FOCUSED AND FLEXIBLE

Words that describe you:
Casual
Informal
Compliant
Reliable
Organized
Solid
Dependable
Uncommitted
Genuine

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
When you take on a task at work or at home, you are reliable; you get the job done. In an organized way, you define the goal, lay out a plan, figure how long the task will take, and get to work "solid and dependable you".But and this is important you're not a slave to the plan. You're committed to it, but not chained to it; the connection is more casual and informal. You know that sometimes "the best laid plans" fall off the tracks; when this happens, you clean up the train wreck and start over, undeterred. Though not happening often, when plans change, you're okay with it. In fact, sometimes you change the plan. It's too nice of a Saturday to finish organizing the garage. Let's go for a bike ride instead. True, the next rainy Saturday will likely find you back in the garage, but for now the work can wait. What an interesting combination of qualities in you're organized, but casual; solid, but compliant; and dependable, but informal. At home and at work, people know they can rely on you. You take great satisfaction in knowing that people think of you as disciplined and responsible, but you also know that you have something of a free spirit in you, and when this spirit moves you, off you go, following the impulse of the moment. You are rightly proud of your work ethic, but you also enjoy your willingness to lay the tools down, crank up the music and play like a child.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
Some people live like Marines: duty-bound, disciplined and driven. To these people you might seem uncommitted; where they would never leave work for play or change plans in the middle of their life's forced march, you let the circumstance sway you and move in a different direction, and they don't understand. Others live like kites on a string, attached by thin threads to the solid ground of responsibility and are blown about by every gust of impulse or imagination. To these people you might seem too cowardly, like you'll flirt with your impulses but never give in fully, play on a Saturday but never blow of the entire work-week to "follow your bliss".While these Marines and kite-flyers might look down on you for your combination of focus and flexibility, others might be envious. They can't free themselves from a sense that they're not doing enough, or from the equally frustrating feeling that they're not free enough. And here you are with your accomplishments and your pleasures, getting the job done but also getting your hair blown back as you run with the wind. As far as these people are concerned, you're lucky you've got the best of both of the worlds in which they feel they fail.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
What a great life you have, and a great attitude to boot. You know when to buckle down and push ahead to get the job done, and you do it well. You know when to lay the tools of your trade aside, grab your kite and head for the meadow where you can run with the wind. Many people will see and admire in you this lovely combination of a person who can focus, but who is flexible enough to know when to let the spirit move you in some new and livelier direction. It's a life they aspire to, and they delight in seeing it played out in your life. They may ask your advice and turn you into a mentor of the full and balanced experience. They will want to know how you do it, what the costs are, and if you get frightened that you're not working hard enough or playing often enough. They may make you think about your own life more than you have, so you can share it with those who want to emulate this balance between flexibility and focus. They may be correct lucky you!

Emotional Stability: Steady or Responsive

In the attempt to continue to figure out who God has made me to be, this has helped me to kind of "peg" what I do and why I do it. It's not the WHOLE nutshell, but some;)

On Emotional Stability you are:
SOMETIMES STEADY, SOMETIMES RESPONSIVE

Words that describe you:
Adaptable
Engaged
Able to Cope
Passionate
Perceptive
Flexible
Receptive
Aware
Avid

A General Description of Your Reactivity
In some ways, you've got the best of emotional worlds. When emotions rise up from inside you or are brought forth from a conversation by a friend, you know how to engage them. You deal with sadness, fear, joy, anger - whatever comes up - in ways that are perceptive and flexible. You can adapt to whatever level of emotion is appropriate to the moment. At other times, you are able to cope with your emotions in a more reserved manner. Because you are aware of what does and does not make emotional sense in a particular situation, you will decide when it is an appropriate time to express your emotions and when it would be best to keep them to yourself.All of this gives you a rich emotional life. You are free to express your passions about certain subjects with appropriate people. But you are also emotionally adaptable; if the conversation needs to be more cerebral, you'll keep it "in your head" and talk calmly through whatever issue is on the table. This emotional awareness serves you well. You seldom get in over your head, either by opening up to the wrong person or by triggering in someone else's emotions they may not be able to deal with.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
When it comes to dealing with emotions we all meet some people with whom we don't match well. You bring a balanced approach to your emotional life. As such, those who are at the extremes are most likely to have a negative reaction to you. Those who live in their emotions may feel you tend to "live in your head" while those who go through life as an emotional rock may feel that you are a bit too "touchy feely" for their approach.And of course it is always possible that because you do balance your emotional approach to life you may misread others - we all do at times. So there have undoubtedly been those times when you have misread cues and stayed in your head with someone who hoped for a more open emotional approach or you may have opened up emotionally with someone who keeps their emotions bottled up. But these things happen and since you do have a good balance of being in touch with your emotions and not being overly impacted by emotional swings, you undoubtedly are able to adapt.Another potential problem is that as people get to know you well, they will discover that you have a great balance between emotional expression and emotional control. If they don't have this balance they may wind up envying you. They can't express feelings as well as you, or they are too often out of emotional control and resent you for your ability to cope so well with the very emotions that may trip them up.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Many people will be grateful to find a friend like you who can stay in control when emotions verge on chaos, but who can also go into the tangle of emotions when it is safe and appropriate to do so. Because of your ability to engage them at whatever level they are comfortable, to adapt to whatever changes in emotion emerge in the conversation, and to cope so well with all of it - well, they'll be very glad they found a person like you. You may, in fact, wind up as something of an emotional mentor. Your awareness of the emotional temperature of a situation, your ability to adapt to either heat or cold, and your ability to cope with whatever winds up happening in the conversation could be models for them to follow as they come to terms with their own emotional worlds.

Openness: Curious or Contented

In the attempt to continue to figure out who God has made me to be, this has helped me to kind of "peg" what I do and why I do it. It's not the WHOLE nutshell, but some;)

On the Openness Dimension you are:
CURIOUS

Words that describe you:
Original
Inventive
Thinker
Brave
Eccentric
Avant-Garde
Out-of-Touch
Unique

A General Description of How You Approach New Information and Experiences
You think like an artist. Or better, you SEE like an artist. While most people look at life's straight lines, its height and depth and width, you're bending the lines with your imagination and turning black and white into shades of blue and yellow. And in conversations at work or with your friends you want to ask, "Do you see what I see?" A few might, most don't, but you've piqued everyone's curiosity with your own original and inventive ways of thinking.
You can, if you must, think in conventional ways. But left on your own, you'll usually opt for the eccentric or avant-garde; in fact you're usually bored with what everyone else is comfortable with. You learn from reading, talking, watching people and other fauna and flora, and simply sitting in the soft chair of your mind and wondering how people would learn how to count if they could only use uneven numbers. You are out in front of conventional ideas, bravely originally defining true and false, right and wrong, the good, the bad and the ugly.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward Your Style of Thinking
You drive through life faster than the speed limit, and when you hit speed bumps, and you hit a lot of them with your mind distracted from the straight line ahead your wheels leave the ground.
For people who like life at a safer speed, you move too fast and lose touch too often with the solid ground they prefer, hence their discomfort with you. As odd as you might find this, many people feel safe in the shelter of the world they already know. They like the familiar. They breathe easily and sleep deeply knowing with more certainty how the world works. So although they might enjoy your company and be curious about your latest notion of how to count backwards by threes, they can only take you in small doses. And they wish you'd quit trying to push the boundaries of their personal and social cosmos.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Even those whom you make uncomfortable know, as just about everyone does, that you're not a flake. You think well, and even your wildest fancies have their roots in the deep soil of sound ideas and tested beliefs. So even if some people don't want to drive at high speed with you, they will respect you for your courage as an innovative and unconventional thinker. You lend color and imagination to what would otherwise be the straight black and white lines of their work world and social environments.
A few more daring people of your circle might even learn from you to take a risk they would otherwise never consider. As comfortable as they are on solid ground, they may be curious about what it would be like to go faster than the speed limit, or paint the living room two shades of blue, or question ideas or beliefs they've fingered like sacred beads since they were children.
After all, they watch you do it, and you seem no worse for the risks you take. In fact, your eyes are wider and your breath quicker, and maybe they can find at least a bit of this for themselves. To be certain, they don't want their wheels to leave the ground, but maybe the next time they approach a speed bump they might just brace themselves and speed up just a little bit.

Agreeableness: Taking care of others or taking care of myself

In the attempt to continue to figure out who God has made me to be, this has helped me to kind of "peg" what I do and why I do it. It's not the WHOLE nutshell, but some;)

You are best described as:
USUALLY TAKING CARE OF OTHERS

Words that describe you:
Understanding
Unquestioning
Humane
Selfless
Gentle
Kindhearted
Gullible
Indulgent

A General Description of How You Interact with Others
Here's one important truth about you: you have a tender heart. Yes, you know that others need to learn to take care of themselves. Yes, you know they need to accept the consequences of their foolish or bad behavior. And sometimes, even when your instinct is to help them, you will let them fend for themselves and let them suffer the consequences of their choices or circumstances.

But most of the time you are there to help when they need you. If they are in trouble, you offer compassion and go out of your way to be helpful. If they need someone who will listen, you are trustworthy and sympathetic. And you are direct with them; when they need advice or counsel, you offer it in a straightforward, direct manner, without beating around the bush.

You're also smart enough to know that you cannot take good care of others if you fail to take good care of yourself, so you listen to your own wants and needs. If you've run out of sympathetic energy, you spend time restoring yourself. If you've ignored your own pain or frustration, you find a friend who will listen well, or go into your own private healing place and give yourself permission to focus on you.

But before long, you're back at it with your friends, offering a sympathetic ear and compassion on which they learn to trust, also giving straightforward advice and counsel when they ask for it. You do know how to take care of yourself, but your genuine interest is in taking care of others.

Negative Reactions Others May Have Toward You
Selfish people might be embarrassed by you. While they're using their time and energy almost exclusively on themselves, they see you giving time to others, and your kindness puts them in a bad light.

Maybe they'll think you're a phony, that you use your altruism to get others indebted to you so they'll then owe you a favor. Or perhaps they'll accuse you, directly or behind your back, of focusing on the needs of others so no one ever focuses on your foibles or your genuine wounds.

All of these are false accusations; yours is a genuine compassion, because you truly have a tender heart. One criticism might be more substantial, though. People might notice when you let things get out of balance and spend so much time responding to others that you neglect your own needs.

Perhaps it's true to some extent that you are more comfortable when the focus is on someone else's needs than when you and your needs are front and center, and this may be a criticism worth paying attention to.

Positive Responses Others May Have Toward You
Positive responses to you are likely to far outweigh negative responses. For many people, your genuine kindness will be an example of a way to treat others and a way we want others to treat us. They will see in you the traits of compassion and sympathy which they might want to focus on in the development of their own character.

For those people you help you will be the friend they need, there at the right moment to help them when they've stepped into yet another thicket of pain or confusion. They will be grateful for your listening, for your straight talk when they need straight talk more than anything, and for the hand you extend so they can find their way, with your help, out of whatever tangle they've gotten themselves into.

“Christ of his gentleness/Thirsting & hungering/Walked in the wilderness/Soft words of grace he spoke/Unto lost desert-folk/That listened wondering".

By the way, i know for me that resolutions made, crumble and fall for year, every year.
Blah.

God's doin' a lot of amazing work with our bible study, our friend Kirsten had mentioned what her church was doing and instead of lists of breakable resolutions,

we focus on One Word.

myoneword.org
Choose Your Word
The normal, natural pace of you life will not likely push you towards spiritual formation, so something must be done to combat our listless drifting. You will not simply wander into the life for which you were made.
My One Word can help. This exercise forces you to be clear and creates a direction for your growth, without causing you to be overwhelmed by the hundreds of things you should be working on.
So how do you go about picking a word?
DETERMINE THE KIND OF PERSON YOU WANT TO BECOME
The first step is to simply take some time and decide what kind of person you want to be at the end of this year. This goes beyond simply being healthier and wealthier, but it must drive deep into your soul. What about the condition of your heart? What about the person that God Himself has created you to be?
IDENTIFY THE CHARACTERISTICS OF THAT PERSON
Get a picture of that person and then simply identify their major characteristics.
Is that person gentle?
Is that person generous?
What are the qualities of the person you want to become?
SIMPLY PICK A WORD
Once you have a list of the characteristics, simply pick a word. There might be fifteen things that you want to change, but you must resist the temptation to promise you will do them all. Instead, simply commit to ONE WORD.
This will provide you with a lens to see the changes you need to make as well as a way to determine whether or not change is actually happening. Understand that this process is hard, but staying focused on your word will help you to struggle in the right direction so that you can actually see God working in your life.
We will be sharing this journey together-let us know how God is changing you by sharing your one word, and reading about the experiences of others on the read page. This is a journey that we are taking together, hoping that God will change us for the sake of ourselves, the other people in our lives, and ultimately for His own Glory.

My word is:
Gentleness

Upon praying and first hearing this word, I was like "whhaaaa??"
Fear was my first initial feeling, associating Gentleness with weak, being a push-over or door-mat. So I brought this fear to God and Lord confirmed "You're still strong by being gentle, by being assertive, you're still strong and courageous by being who you are in gentleness. You will not be walked over".
Whew. My heart breathed sigh of relief. As you may have read in one before this entry, God's exposing weaknesses within my heart that I am to give to him and areas in my heart to do with attention and standing up for myself.. need turning over to God and adjusting.

Lord promises me that He's bringing me balance, in this dance He's bringing me back to my center-point, somewhere to start off from.. if working this gentle word into my life is it, then.. bring it.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control." (Galatians 5:22)

I know the Lord is intentional with His written word. To learn His intentions for the fruits of the Spirit, His words sow life, I want to reap what I can get.

"Sometimes your entire life boils down to one insane move." - Jake Sully, Avatar
And sometimes, Gentleness really is jus an insane move.

First of Journalling Gentleness

Journal: Who deserves the attention

How shallow am I. Always turning inwards, to see myself, tend to my lonely being. I'm always one to try to do good in the world. Make it better, that somehow through acts and words the Lord gives me will somehow move the world a little closer to knowing His love.

The Lord says "Do", I cringe out of fear of the unknown but I do.
The Lord says "Say this..", despite my foggy brain I "say this" knowing Lord will do with His power with His words what He may.

Still, even 'til now, a lot of me wants people to see that I do good. My lust for praise, after tuning in to what my yearnings actually sound like is as banging pots and jibberish baby talk.
If after all this time I still look for the constant encouragement of others,

have I not really seen Jesus' command as enough? That He's pleased with me when others don't see what I do?

Gaahhhhh.

Stupid human feelings. I know I slap myself for things I think, say or do most times. God? Your patient with me right?

In all this banter, I'm still talking about myself..

To get to the point, I know I've especially been bothered by not been given "proper praise" for things I do since I've moved back to Abbotsford (August 2008). It's come to minor explosions within me especially in the past year, and I feel the festering crap building up in me, higher and higher, and I know I've let the frustrations creep out some.

Lid's not goin stay on til I actually get somethin done with this.

So I was here with you Lord, in our green/brown room of our place that we are soon moving out of, reading The Practice of Godliness on the Chapter to do with Gentleness.

I've jus felt like You've laid your heart on mine and let me feel some of what You feel all the time. I spat about attention I don't get. I don't hear.. or don't think I hear of the spats You have about attention your nation doesn't give you.

Humbles me to know my concerns are so feeble. And Jesus, yours are great, your glory is unspeakable.

"To WHOM will you compare Me???

Or WHO is MY EQUAL? says the Holy One.

Lift your eyes..

and look! to the heavens:

WHO CREATED ALL THESE?

He who brings out the starry host one by one,

and calls them each by name.

Because

of His great power

and mighty strength,

not one of them is missing".

isaiah 40:25&26

(Image from "The Johnson Nebula" blog)

Wow.

YES! Who has made all that we know to be there? The Holy One.

I suddenly feel so small again. I am awakened again to see HE is SO GREAT again.

And you're a jealous God! I know I've experienced jealousy.. i know I would give all to smite the person who was stealing my love's attention.

You're a patient God. I don't understand that. In all the things I know I do and I know what people in world must do.. that anyone in right mind would go nuts and impatient with the human race such as yourself. But Bible speaks of your patience, gentleness, love, compassion.

I've fallen in love with your pursuing heart Lord.

I love your Love.

I thank you so much for so much I know I don't even know of all the amazing tasks you perform day to day, second by second.

Show me how You've made me to give YOU the GLORY?! In all the ways you've knit me, how do I give you praise you deserve?... please, I'm at lost sometimes.

And none of that to even be about me giving you praise, but in that when you time to time search the world through for hearts that will love you, listen to you, when you are looking for your spirit within our souls screaming for praise to you, I believe it is You who has placed that desire within me to praise you in the first place and really it's your Holy Spirit in me!

GLORY. IS ALL YOURS.

I dont have to move the world. Already, the Lord has come to this world, He's stepped from God Almighty to humbled savior we know as Jesus Christ.

God, I see you.

You've made all that we see, you've made paths that we can venture that lead right to you.

Thank you for your Holy Spirit that you've poured into us.

To glorify you

and only you my Lord,

here I am.

Journalling: Gentleness

Psalm: Face to Face

Prayer is something we can carry with us wherever we are- in the cities, in the country, on our knees, while we walk, with many people, when (if!) we're swallowed by fish (Jonah 2), "before the cross", before the altar, in church, in the allies, our homes 'behind closed doors', during the day, in the long nights

~By day the LORD directs his love, at night his song is with me— a prayer to the God of my life~Psalm 42.8

Our prayers are like burned incense, it rises up like smoke and is a sweet smell to God. All of the prayers in the world rise up and is a sweet smell to God.

Psalm 141:2 ~May my prayer be set before you like incense; may the lifting up of my hands be like the evening sacrifice.~

This picture to the right reminds me of that. We are face to face with God. We are meeting with the Almighty, our soul continuing to shift to be in line with Him, life is pouring into us. Our life lifted up in prayer before God... as sweet incense. Something I also see in the picture is that as the prayers are lifted up, there's an aroma going up, like fire. There's something beautiful about a thousand voices, or congregation full, of people when they're all lifted as one voice, on prayer, one song. Unity God desires us to have, a community with the same heart after God. It's beautiful. I am also reminded of heaven when I hear all the voices lifted together. I imagine the angels singing with us as we give glory to our King.

...I admit, I think.. wait, I know that my prayers really do stink sometimes. There's no meaning to it. I pray for selfish reasons, or I WANT certain things from God. There's a lot of reasons prayers go stinky. Ewk. Slowly prayers were every other day and then whenever I was in need. The less I prayed, I noticed the more I had trouble in my life's walk. My actions became slower. My faith became more "work" rather than jus living it simply. I looked and looked, but did not perceive. "Aah God! I need help!"

And this was the thing, I knew I could talk to God, I knew I could hear Him and knew He was listening, but.. shame. It drove me from kneeling before God. Unworthiness told me I could no longer look into the face of God. But...God is forgiving. Anyone who confesses wrong-doing and takes forgiveness is taken into the Lord's embrace. They stand in GRACE. "Grace is sufficient" (vs?) He whispers "I have heard your prayer". The barrier is then removed FULLY, I imagine for those who hoped in the Lord in the Bible and I know for me, life HAS poured out once those words were spoken "I have heard your prayers". Relief like waves of peace wash over my soul and bless my heart, 'I am heard. Someone is listening'.

All seasons, every season, we can come before the Lord.

Broken and shamed and hurting and sinful,

He lets our eyes see Him. He moves so far to blanket us with Grace. More than even we want, He desires of our worship. To say "Yes" to Him, to say "Jesus, my Savior"...

He embodies us with His covering Holy Spirit,

and then,

truely we can say "Abba"

... and truely He says "My child..."

Face to Face II

Face to face with God Himself. We kneel before Him in prayer, the eyes of our hearts look heavenward, and the hands of our soul reach out. We converse. It's about the waiting, We listen. In silence. God quiets the voices in our heads that seem loud. Forgetting the worries of this world. Laying down "responsibilities" of life. Let His Holy Presence hover over you. Let Him take off the weights of the worries.. fears.. expectations.. family pressures... let go of anxiety of friendships, throw off pressures of work, pressures of school.

This is a promise assured to you: "God heard them, for their prayer reached heaven, his holy dwelling place (2 Chronicles 30.27)" It's just you and God. Let Him take you on a journey- a place of peace apart from your busy world. What does that place look like? Imagine it.

My journey that He takes me to is to Himself. Standing before 'a great presence'. I take God's presence with me wherever I go, as if He is there right then. He's with me now. He's with you. I lose myself in Him. There's only light in Him. No darkness. When I desire to hide from the world, I hide myself in him. When I need healing, I am wrapped in God's arms. When I am afraid, His presence is with me. When I'm angry.. I vent my frustration to God or wait. Wait and let His understanding console me. One thing I would love is that in every season of my soul.. I would dance.

Every one of us just naturally move in a certain way in how we are. God's pressed into us grooves here, markings there. Seeing the contrast with God's eyes of His created one is great! To be with a whole lot of people, in every individual I jus see how wonderfully they are made and in some way I see Jesus in them. Dancing is natural. Not only to me. To many. Probably more than I can imagine. I know, I know! there are people who desire to dance when I'm in church, at college, or big groups. But no one does it.

And so Lord, I pray release over my church. The spirit of your spontaneous joy be upon them. And they would know it's you. Some are in deep despair. Some wallow in arrogance. Some have shielded themselves so much, their walls they don't even know how many layers there are.

But You know.

You know the hearts of your people. You are calling them back. Bringing them up.

Redeeming what is yours. Though we are weak, we fail, we hurt, and doubt..

Give courage to those who feel your calling on their names, maybe it won't be dancing or praying aloud or anything as we see it, but small ways you move.

Give us eyes to see...

Psalm: You are Beautiful to me

This is a psalm, a love letter. Again in my dorm room at Columbia Bible College, during my first year, I was just awed at the remarkable beauty of my Lord. When I think of God, I see more than the beauty of sunsets, more synchronizing than that of fire, the peace of that soft blowing wind... SHEER beauty. None like Him, so I have written this...I was supposed to write a psalm for one of our trips sailing on the ocean (close to Victoria). I wrote this before I went out sailing in my room, imagining what it would be like out on the ocean, to see the sunrise and sunset.This poem was just a foreshadow. My experience was my poem made alive to see, to hear, to breathe, but even more so because... i was actually there.

"Yahweh, You are beautiful to me. Your beauty far greater than the angels, further than the dance of the sunset fire, deeper than the ocean at gaze. You captivate me, o my soul does fly. I, with the wind, do make my sails, upon your breathe, in your Son shining glory. Your wonder brings comfort upon my troubled soul. Your emnity draws my soul to your peace. O Beauty does mount up your name. Jesus... how I do love thee. So beautiful, all your ways, my Love. You meet me in the morning, your warmth of kiss to my soul, my thoughts are of you all my days, and my every moment that i am awake. Your wonder not due at sun break, but it goes on in through the nights, we walk upon the beach of my life. We gaze at the stars you have placed. We walk, we run, we sit, we dance. My Lord, theres none but words I can find, none in this world, for its not of You, none that could describe Your beauty in my eyes. How much more wondrous you are! Draw me closer, draw me into Your heart... Your beauty fills my eyes, I can only stare, there's none that I can say but- Jesus, You are so beautiful to me."